


We're the Same, Only Different by Name

by Velocity_Owl87



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alien Biology, Alien Cultural Differences, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Betrayal, Careers Have Issues, Falling In Love, First Time, Forced Bonding, Hopeful Ending, Love Letters, M/M, Male-Female Friendship, Mentor/Protégé, Politics, Unplanned Pregnancy, jinnobi challenge 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2018-10-18
Packaged: 2019-08-04 01:25:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16337078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Velocity_Owl87/pseuds/Velocity_Owl87
Summary: Qui-Gon Jinn may be a talented Jedi, but is far too Unorthodox for the Council and one last misstep has them plotting his exit by setting him up for failure.This happens in Wild Space where warring Clans refuse to honour his negotiations due to him being classed as inferior due to his speciation. They demand redress and public proof that his mate, a male mate, will be the one to honour the agreements.Enter Obi-Wan, who takes up the responsibility for his Master, despite his ambiguious and confused feelings in the matter. Feelings he doesn't get a chance to explore when Qui-Gon is pushed out of the Order and plans have to be made for either a future with Qui-Gon and his family, or a future in the Order.What will Obi-Wan choose?





	We're the Same, Only Different by Name

**Author's Note:**

> I honestly have no idea where this came from, other than I wanted to write for the Jinnobi challenge and the idea of Qui-Gon being basically stitched up by the Council to get rid of him and his unorthodox ways. So this was done. 
> 
> Title is from the Kaiser Chief's "Hole in my Soul"

_ “Master Yoda, despite Master Jinn being a skilled knight, he is starting to prove a thorn in the Council’s side. You have read the reports from the last mission he and Padawan Kenobi undertook in Mandalorian space.” _

_ Master Mundi pointed out to their grandmaster. _

_ No one could deny that despite the skilful work Jinn and his padawan had done in keeping the Duchess safe, the negotiations to do so had been “unorthodox” to say the least. _

_ Even more glaring was the clear omission of attachment shown by padawan and the Duchess. Something that Jinn had more or less glossed over. _

_ “Hmmm, concerned you are? Reason not, I see.” _

_ Master Windu cleared his throat. _

_ “Normally, we would look the other way. After all, he is more or less following the Force and situations tend to work out for all concerned. No. The concern is with Jinn quite possibly being tainted due to his frequent visits to Count Dooku, who reports agree, is involved in something dark side related. What exactly that is has not been revealed.” _

_ Yoda’s ears twitched at that and Master Rancis frowned. _

_ “That…That changes things. Jinn is good. Very good. But if he is associated with Count Dooku and the dark side, it would not bode well. Not in these times.” _

_ Yoda covered his mouth with his hand. _

_ “What suggest you?” _

_ Master Galla and Master Koon looked at each other. _

_ “A neutralisation of sorts.” _

_ Master Koon suggested, making Masters Galla and Bilaba glare at him once they realised what he meant. Despite the delicate phrasing, it was all too clear what he meant, given Jinn’s biology. _

_ “How could you even  _ think _ of making such a suggestion?” _

_ Master Galla hissed, followed by Master Billaba. And Master Yaddle. _

_ “I make it simply because if we let yet another one of Master Jinn’s discretions pass, we could be pulled into a dire situation that we cannot afford to be in. No. Better we use the weapons we have at our disposal and neutralise him now that we actually can.” _

_ The female masters were still not happy at being told the reasons, and they murmured with each other in unhappy tones before turning back to the bulk of the council. _

_ “We are still not in agreement. Qui-Gon Jinn may not follow the rules to the letter, but this wholly unfair. You are condemning him on pure speculation.” _

_ Master Galla pointed out. _

_ “Would you suggest the same recourse to neutralise myself or Master Bilaba?” _

_ Master Koon nodded. _

_ “I would.” _

_ All of the females cried out angrily at that admission. _

_ “If you presented as much danger to the Order as Qui-Gon does, I would. In a heartbeat. We have put up with his breaches to protocol for long enough.” _

_ Master Windu frowned at Master Mundi’s proclamation. _

_ “Say we do get rid of Jinn. What do we do in regards to Padawan Kenobi?” _

_ Master Mundi shook his head. _

_ “The padawan isn’t the same as the Master. We don’t have to worry about him doing anything differently. Myself and others can finish his training and have him ready for the trials. He’s nearly twenty-one and ready for knighthood.” _

_ Master Galla shook her head. _

_ “I cannot agree to this subterfuge. It is underhanded and unethical. I vote against.” _

_ Master Bilaba nodded. As did Master Yaddle.  _

_ “That’s three against. Anyone else?” _

_ Three other hands went up. But it was not enough. _

_ Master Galla shook her head, while Master Bilaba covered her face with her hands while Master Yaddle frowned. _

_ “The motion has passed. Qui Gon Jinn will be taken care of.” _

_ There was silence in the Council Chambers.  _

_ “Where shall he go?” _

_ The Masters looked at each other. _

_ “Wild Space.” _

_ ~*~*~*~*~*~ _

Qui-Gon shut off the cold water and stepped out of the stall, reaching out for the towel and roughly rubbing his skin dry.

He got out of the fresher and got dressed, careful to not wake Obi-Wan who was still out cold in the other room. He needed the sleep, after staying up to do some research for the mission he would undertake with Master Tahl, who had graciously accepted to take over some of Obi-Wan’s training while he went out on the urgent mission that he had been assigned to overnight.

Qui-Gon frowned at that as he towelled off the excess water from his hair, braiding it while still damp.

He didn’t understand the sudden urgency that the mission had been presented to him. Especially since Shaak Ti was in that area and could have easily stepped into the dispute that he was being sent to mediate.

He didn’t question their wisdom, despite having disagreements with them. As much as he followed the Force, he did recognise the authority that they had over him as a Jedi Master. So he had accepted the verdict after voicing his reasons.

He frowned as he got dressed. Their reasoning hadn’t really stood up to scrutiny, now that he thought about it. 

Adi and Depa had been quiet, their thoughts carefully hidden behind neutral expressions while Mundi and Rancis along with Windu had done most of the talking in those no nonsense, clipped tones that wouldn’t tell Qui-Gon much of anything. He hadn’t thought about, since the Force had been muted and humming somewhat in passive agreement. 

But now, it was silent and it made him uneasy. 

Despite his reputation as unorthodox, he wasn’t going to abandon a mission. He knew he had to go and try and make the best out of the case and prevent needless civil wars and death. He knew his worth and he knew that unless it was a dire situation, he wouldn’t have been asked to go.

Yet the silence from the Force was telling even as he grabbed his rucksack and packed away the essentials that he’d need for his trip. He calculated he’d be away for maybe two weeks. Three weeks at the most if the negotiations were much more complex and delicate than planned. So he planned for extra time and even packed an extra supply of suppressants in case his cycle came close. 

Although most of the galaxy was accepting of different biologies, he didn’t want to take the chance of being caught in a delicate situation unable to take care of his body’s needs. So the suppressants were the only disliked option. Especially since his body didn’t respond well to the usual brands out there. 

They made him sick, but it would stave off the worse effects of the cycle until he could get somewhere safe to ride it out. Or have someone, namely Tahl, help him through it. 

It wasn’t ideal, especially due to the unspoken feelings between them, but it did the trick and there was no danger of him getting pregnant. It wasn’t what he needed or craved, but it didn’t break the Code, so it was tacitly approved. 

Maybe in time, they would be able to-

“Master, are you already leaving?”

Qui-Gon turned back to smile at his padawan as he closed up his rucksack.

“I am. The shuttle is leaving in two hours.  The mission is in Wild Space and it’s a long journey.”

He explained as he shouldered his bag and clasped Obi-Wan’s shoulder.

“Will you be gone long, Master?”

Obi Wan asked slightly anxiously. 

“Two weeks if everything goes well. Three if there are any complications in the negotiations.”

Qui-Gon explained. 

“Master Tahl has instructions for your training if anything goes amiss. I don’t expect any issues to arise. All will be well, Obi-Wan.”

Obi-Wan smiled, but it wasn’t his usual gentle smile that made warm and strong affection well up in Qui-Gon. 

It was more tight and sharp around the edges, making him feel slightly uneasy.

“Obi-Wan? Is there something wrong?”

Obi-Wan shook his head, making Qui-Gon’s unease flare up again.

“Just worried. It’s not often that the Council sends you off on a mission alone.”

Qui-Gon though the same thing, but didn’t say anything.

“It’s a simple mission and they didn’t want to interrupt your training.”

Obi-Wan nodded after a moment of hesitation.

“I suppose. The Council knows what they are doing. I wish you well, Master.”

Qui-Gon smiled and cupped Obi-Wan’s cheek, giving a soft purr that Obi-Wan returned with a soft trill. 

“Thank you. May the Force be with you, Obi-Wan.”

Obi-Wan smiled. 

“And with you as well, Master.”

~*~*~*~*~

Qui-Gon was kneeling with his cheek pressed against the cold tiles of the courtroom he had strolled past three weeks ago. 

He had noticed the colours against the white tiles, the gold and black accents when he had crossed them on his way to mediate the dispute between the Barra and the Trannavan clans in the Wild Space. He just hadn’t guessed he would be facing them up close and personal. 

Nor did he guess that he would be there with his arms tied behind his back and wearing only his leggings and tunic, which were plastered against his skin with sweat. They had pulled him out of the room they had locked him into once they had figured out what he was a few hours before his replacement and potential mate would arrive.

They had told him as much when they had stripped him of his boots, belt, bag, and sabre.

“A real Jedi this time to actually resolve this dispute rather than some bitch in heat.”

Aino, the scion of an impoverished house that had been assigned as his guide and had turned into his guard for the duration of his tenure had sneered at him as he had tied his arms behind his back and pulled him to the courtroom. 

The Force inhibitor and shock collar they had managed to get on him once they had stunned and subdued him had taken care of any rebellion he may have entertained. As it was, his cycle and shame had blocked any thoughts in regards to that. 

The threats of a civil war breaking out due to it being his fault were also enough to keep him compliant.

It had been the reason why they had been able to manhandle him to such an extent.

He had been thrown to the cold ground in that position in the first act of humiliation. 

He had an inkling of what they were planning: A ritual mating and then negotiations that would simply require a signature from the two parties. The groundwork had been laid by him, but they wouldn’t ratify it until they had a “real” Jedi to oversee it. 

Apparently, the Council had neglected to research the basic prejudices and cultures of the Wild Space planet he had landed in. To the clans, Yavinese weren’t their definition of males and sires. They were regarded just above a teenage female, a person that had little power in the clan structure.

Having sent a Yavinese to them was a heavy insult that needed rectifying.

And the Jedi had to scramble to make it right. 

Qui-Gon understood that there would be times when his diplomacy would fail and he would have to step back and let someone else handle the negotiations. 

But this time, he knew he had failed completely.

And the failure would seal his fate.

The Jedi that they would send would set the pattern of his life and he had no way of figuring out what that could possibly be.The early uneasiness crept back and he started breathing rapidly as the feeling got stronger.

This and the collar had him blind to what was being said and who the Jedi was that had come into the courtroom.

He heard them, but it was like listening to someone trying to call him while his head was underwater. It was all muffled and distorted and it was why it wasn’t until he felt a pair of calloused, but gentle hands lift up his head and look at him that it all came together with the force of a stun shot at his chest.

“Obi-Wan?”

Obi-Wan nodded.

“Take him to the guest chambers to get him ready for the mating once we are done here. Aino will serve as a guide and witness in this.”

The Barra Elder spoke out, making Qui-Gon want to snarl or sob, he couldn’t tell which. 

“Surely that won’t be necessary.”

Obi-Wan argued in that polished Coruscant accent that would work well enough in the future, but now was only an echo of what it would be.

“It is, I’m afraid. We need to make sure that the mating has been completed. We are well aware of the Jedi attitudes towards mating. We need absolute proof, or the talks will be discontinued under the charge of deception by the Jedi Council.”

Qui-Gon saw the small twitch of Obi-Wan’s eyes at the blatant blackmail that the Barra Elder and no doubt, the Trannavan Elders had agreed upon before Obi-Wan had set foot in courtroom.

“I see.Will he be there the whole night?”

The Clan Elder shook his head. “Only to know the mating has occurred. Whatever other couplings you will undertake will be at your discretions.”

Obi-Wan’s mouth tightened into a flat line at that statement. He nodded as he turned to face the Elders. 

“I agree to your terms. Let us proceed.”

Obi-Wan flashed him an undecipherable look that could have been anything before he stood up and walked away without looking back once. 

“Get up”

That was all the warning he got before being hauled to his feet and dragged off.

~*~*~*~*~*~*

_ “Tahl, to what do we owe the pleasure?” _

_ Adi Galla asked as he waited for Tahl to explain why she was calling in the middle of the night. _

_ Tahl sighed, sitting back and crossing her arms as she composed herself before she spoke. _

_ “Oh, simply the fact that no one compiled a proper dossier on Wild Space clans and Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan are being sacrificed for the hubris of the Order as we speak.” _

_ Adi Galla swore.  _

_ “What do you mean?” _

_ Tahl shook her head.  _

_ “Apparently, Qui-Gon being sent here was an insult to the Clans and they agreed to accept the mate of the first delegate. That being Obi-Wan.” _

_ Adi Galla gasped, her blue eyes shocked and wide at what Tahl was telling her.  _

_ “Why Obi-Wan? Why not you?” _

_ Tahl smiled bitterly. “Maybe a mention that their culture is highly misogynist and sexist. They wouldn’t accept me as Qui-Gon’s mate. Only Obi-Wan. They also demand proof and have planted a witness there to make sure the mating has proceeded.” _

_ Adi Galla scrubbed at her face tiredly, her eyes dark and full of sorrow. _

_ “Was there any way to prevent it?” _

_ Tahl shook her head. “They felt that sending Qui-Gon was a grave insult to them, since Yavinese have little to no power in their society. Thus the talks were invalid unless they were validated by his mate. Which of course, in their view, was Obi-Wan.” _

_ Adi Galla sat back in her chair and shook her head.  _

_ “This is bad. That goes without saying. But we can fix it surely. How fast can you leave? Your reports, have you sent them in?” _

_ Tahl grimaced. “We can’t leave for two weeks yet. There will be feasts and games held in honour of the agreement. As for the report, I can omit as much as I can possibly...But if Qui-Gon was in a cycle, it will be a moot point in a few months.” _

_ Tahl pointed out. Adi waved it away.  _

_ “We can try. But for now, hope he didn’t.” _

_ Tahl smiled grimly. “That’s all I can do, really.” _

_ ~*~*~*~*~ _

Obi-Wan watched the pre-dawn lights come through the blinds and tried to tamp down the guilt that welled up in quiet moments.

Despite the assurances of a heat drunk Qui-Gon that it was the best course of action and how relieved and glad he was that it was Obi-Wan, the guilt consumed him. 

He was all too aware despite the wild abandon that they shared as he had taken Qui-Gon over and over again that Qui-Gon had been damned by his touch. And as much as he tried to forget how Qui-Gon had felt as he entered him, how he cried out when he came. 

Yet the memories were still fresh in his mind and heart and they wouldn’t fade.

He was tempted to release them to the Force, how it had been the first time between them. Yet the more he recalled them, the less he wanted to let them go. 

He had promised himself that he would find a way out of it without having to give in to his baser desires. 

Yet the moment he had stepped into the room, all thoughts of not giving in to lust went out the window the moment he had entered the room and set eyes on Qui-Gon.

Despite their displeasure with him, the clans had made Qui-Gon a vision in silks, and dark kohl around his eyes, making them darker and deeper. His lips had been stained a pale red and his skin oiled in something that made him shimmer as he moved in the dim light. 

His hair had been loose around his shoulders and Obi-Wan was sure he made some kind of noise at the delectable picture his Master presented. Despite the rules and years and protocol, the moment that Qui-Gon had looked at him with those dark eyes full of want and need, Obi-Wan had been lost. 

And Force damn it, he hadn’t regretted a single moment of it. 

He had tasted and touched every inch of that powerful body. Had traced the old scars and had skimmed his hands down his hips and touched that secret place he didn’t think he ever would have the privilege of doing in his lifetime. Or ever.

The way that Qui-Gon had curled up around him when they had been exhausted, the way that his mouth had been kiss swollen and his eyes heavy-lidded and smeared with kohl. The way that despite the situation, laughter had come all too easily and quickly between them as they maneuvered around the awkwardness of new positions. 

For once, he hadn’t thought about the future and had followed his Master’s maxim of staying in the moment.

He was afraid to think of what was going to come the moment that they left those rooms. 

The heat had passed days ago. The feasts were nearing the second week and no one was bothering them. 

Master Tahl was the one attending the feasts and holding her own with the rest of the scions and Clans.

At the thought of the scions, Obi-Wan coloured in remembering how Aino had sat at the entrance of the room and watched the first hurried and sloppy mating. 

The embarrassment in the room had been palpable, the only one not affected being Qui-Gon, since he was far too gone in his cycle and had only just been released from the Force suppression collar that he had been locked into before. 

He had done his best to ignore Aino, who was only too happy to return the favour, and focus on getting Qui-Gon through the first waves of his cycle. 

Something easier than he had expected, since Qui-Gon was all too eager for it, presenting to Obi-Wan and making it easy for him to touch, then slip in and bite him. It was impersonal and almost perfunctory. Something that was rectified in the matings that happened after Aino had sent off his report and had closed the door behind him. 

They had made the other times memorable. They had the time and privacy for it, the Clans treating it like an extended honeymoon and not allowing anyone other than servants near. Even Tahl was barred from seeing them until they were ready to leave. 

Obi-Wan had found it both difficult and a relief that they had that much of an interlude so they could get used to what Obi-Wan knew was going to be their new normal. 

And he found that despite the guilt, he welcomed it.

Just like he knew from the bond between that Qui-Gon felt the same.

He embraced his mate tightly, kissed his head, and watched the sun rise.

~*~*~*~*~

Qui-Gon tried to appear calm and collected as he walked to the Council Chamber. 

He tried to not dwell on how odd it was that they had requested he go to the medical bay and had Tahl and Obi-Wan go ahead and give the reports. Despite the fact that he had been involved in setting up the negotiations, he was asked to get checked out.

The reasoning had been flimsy at best, making him be even more on edge as Healer Che had done the appropriate checks and sent him on his way without giving hint of what she had found or not found. 

He knew there was no point in refusing. He would simply be refused entrance until he had complied with the will of the Council, despite feeling as if he was sealing his doom as he obeyed.

As much as Qui-Gon wanted to pretend that nothing had come out of that short interlude with Obi-Wan, he wasn’t as naive enough to assume that he had come out of it the same. He had, to his chagrin, imprinted on Obi-Wan.

A fact that he had noticed the moment Obi-Wan and Tahl had left him to go on ahead. He knew then that it would be impossible to deny that he and Obi-Wan had broken the tenet of the Code. 

Despite the foolish hope that he had entertained the whole way to the Council Chamber, he knew that it was done. From the still chillness of the room to the neutral and almost forbidding expressions on the Council’s faces, he could see the writing on the wall. 

“Masters.”

He greeted, giving a small bow as he stood in the middle and waited for the verdict.

“Greetings, Master Jinn. You’re probably wondering why the break in protocol regarding your report and Master Tahl’s and Padawan Kenobi.”

Master Rancis spoke first and the temperature of the room dropped even further.

Qui-Gon inclined his head. “I admit I did wonder it.”

Mace was the next to speak.

“We got the report of the situation in Wild Space. We know about the mating, Qui-Gon.”

Qui-Gon’s pulse sped up. Of course they would have known. 

Despite Tahl’s best efforts, the Clans had sent their own report detailing their satisfaction at the resolution of not just the negotiations, but the insult visited upon them.

“The tenets are clear. We could have overlooked the situation if it hadn’t been so public. And if it hadn’t had such tangible repercussions, shall we say?”

Mace steepled his fingers as he sat back and looked at Qui-Gon, who put his hand on his abdomen once he realised what Mace was implying. So that had been the results!

“If nothing had happened, would you have even called me here?”

Qui-Gon asked, his hands going cold as he realised what Mace was alluding to.

“Honestly? No. But this cannot be ignored. If you were to consent to a termina-”

“Absolutely not! You know even better than to ask!”

Mace nodded placidly and Qui-Gon  _ knew _ he had signed his own dismissal. There were a few knowing looks between Council members, and Qui-Gon suspected that they had already counted on his refusal to act upon the suggestion. They knew and had crafted it so he truly had no choice at all.

“We knew you’d feel as such, being so connected with the Living Force and a Yavinese as well. That is why there is no other recourse in this situation. Qui-Gon Jinn, you are expelled from the Jedi Order. Your sabre.”

Qui-Gon stood there, not quite understanding what he was hearing. 

“Are you serious? You’re expelling me from the Order? Over a situation I had no control over? Despite all my years of service and the Code I followed? Just like that, I am no longer part of the Order?”

He looked around in bewilderment and noticed Adi and Deepa looking anywhere but at him. Master Yaddle looked at him sympathetically, but her expression was stony all the same. The rest of the Council was simply implacable.

“Tenets you broke, Qui-Gon Jinn. Proof of it, inside you lies. Part of this Order, you no longer can be.”

His Grandmaster stated calmly, making Qui-Gon’s heart clench in his chest at the words. He had broken other tenets in his career, yet this was the one that had sunk him? He had done everything for the Order and this was how it would end?

He wanted to shout those accusations, but his voice was gone. He was defeated, he knew just from the way that they all retained their distance from him. He was no longer one of them. He was now on the outside. Himself and his children.

He needed to calm down and plan his next move after he gave up his sabre. He had to plan for not just himself. But for the children and for Obi-Wan.

Qui-Gon took a deep breath and exhaled slowly as he unclipped his sabre and placed it on the ground.

“And my padawan? Will he get a Master to finish his training?”

Master Koon was the one to answer.

“He is no longer your concern, Jinn. You have twenty-four hours to set your affairs in order before you leave. You are dismissed.”

Qui-Gon swallowed hard and nodded in an effort to keep a quickly dwindling composure. He knew he had failed the moment that he turned to leave and collapsed, knowing nothing more.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Obi-Wan had nearly fallen asleep when Qui-Gon’s sharp distress and then nothingness through their bond pulled him out of sleep.

Without pausing to think about it, he pulled on his boots and rushed down to the Medical bay, not quite sure how he knew that was where the feeling of distress had generated. All he knew was that he had to be there and make sure that Qui-Gon was safe.

He had been far too tired to stay awake, nerves and the time spent with Qui-Gon had been draining. Even for his reserves, it had been taxing. He had slept until Qui-Gon’s distress had torn him from sleep.

“What happened? Where is he?”

Obi-Wan asked Healer Che intercepted him before he went further into the medical hall. 

“Padawan Kenobi! He is safe and resting right at this moment.”

Obi-Wan gulped a deep breath of air and nodded, somewhat relieved to hear that, but still concerned. 

“What happened to him? Why is he here?”

Obi-Wan asked the moment that he was able to speak again. 

Healer Che beckoned for him to follow her to her office, a partitioned off cubicle with large clear plastisteel walls where she could keep an eye on the patients in need. 

He was both alarmed and relieved to see that Qui-Gon was there, but he was sleeping and didn’t look as if he was in distress. His colour was a bit pale, but he was calm.

“Qui-Gon collapsed in the Council Chamber.”

Obi-Wan’s eyes widened at that.

“Why would he collapse? He was tired, but not to that extent that he’d collapse!”

Healer Che picked up her datapad and gave it to Obi-Wan. He looked at the results, gasping at the information he found there. 

“He’s carrying my children?”

The words were almost a sigh as he handed back the datapad before he dropped it from numb hands. 

“He is.”

Obi-Wan shook his head, running his hands through his hair until it was standing up in spikes all over his head. 

“That was why he collapsed, wasn’t it? They expelled him from the Order, didn’t they?”

Healer Che patted his shoulder gently.

“I’m sorry, Obi-Wan. It is against the Code. He cannot stay.”

Obi-Wan shook his head violently, jerking himself out of her grasp.

“How can they expel him? It wasn’t his fault! After all he did!? How could they just... _ throw him away like that?!” _

Healer Che bit her lip as she tried to placate and comfort him.

“I cannot say why the Council decided on that being the best course of action. Only that it has been decided. He will rest and have another day to make his arrangements and depart.”

Obi-Wan laughed mirthlessly.

“Where can he go? I can’t just let him go alone! He’s carrying my children.”

Healer Che rubbed her forehead. 

“That would be between you and Qui-Gon, but I will remind you that you are still a Padawan. On your way to being a knight. Think about that before you make any decision, is all that I will ask of you.”

Obi-Wan swallowed hard at that. She was right. His knighthood was so close he could taste it, but to let Qui-Gon and his children to walk away…

“I need time to think.” He blew out a breath and ran his hands through his hair again. “Could I sit with him in the meantime?”

Healer Che smiled softly. “Of course.”

He nodded his thanks and went to the chair next to Qui-Gon’s bed and gently took his hand, holding it between his own as he watched over his sleep.

He was at a loss as to what to do now that he was faced with such a life changing decision. 

He had been raised with one objective in mind: To be a Knight. He fought desperately to have that and he was so close to reaching his dream that he couldn’t just walk away. He had to become a knight. He  _ needed _ to become a knight.

Qui-Gon shifting in the bed brought him back to the other choice he could take. 

He couldn’t just let Qui-Gon and his children go and disappear into the galaxy and never see them again. He knew that if he let Qui-Gon walk out that door, he’d lose him forever.

Yet he didn’t know if he could give up the lure of his knighthood being close enough for him to grasp.

He mulled it over until Master Tahl came in, her eyes narrowed in concern as she looked over at her oldest friend and Obi-Wan.

“I just heard he was admitted from Adi Galla. How is he?”

She whispered as she took the other chair and his other hand.

“He’s fine now. Just sleeping.”

Master Tahl sighed in relief at that, squeezing Qui-Gon’s hand at the same time. 

“What caused his collapse? This is Qui-Gon we’re talking about. He’s gone head to head with the Council before. What was so different this time? Adi and the others have clammed up and refused to say anything.”

Obi-Wan debated keeping quiet and letting Qui-Gon handle this, but he also knew that Qui-Gon could quite possibly take off without telling even his older friend anything. 

“He was expelled. He’s carrying my children. That was why he collapsed.”

Obi-Wan explained quietly, making Tahl’s eye widen at the simple statement.

“How could they? It wasn’t as if he willingly set out to break the Code or get pregnant! He had no say in the matter! It’s not like he could stop going through his cycle!”

Obi-Wan nodded numbly. 

“The Council has decided it. He has no choice but to obey. But where will he go? And it’s not like he could go get work anywhere. Who would hire an expelled Jedi? Or one that is pregnant? In fact, does he even have family in Yavin IV?”

Tahl shook her head. “I don’t think so. And even if he did, he wasn’t encouraged to maintain ties with them. Maybe he could go to Naboo. Ask Vallorum for some aid. Or claim refugee status in Alderaan. Queen Breha and her husband would accept him.”

Obi-Wan frowned and his grip tightened around Qui-Gon’s hand, making the man stir.

Worried, he loosened it and sent a wave of calm through their bond, pushing Qui-Gon into a deeper sleep.

Tahl made note of how easily Obi-Wan had been able to push the sleep suggestion onto Qui-Gon and wondered exactly how deep their bond had developed. A deep bond would explain Obi-Wan’s reluctance to leave Qui-Gon’s side. Even if it was detrimental to his future.

“I have a brother on Stewjon. It’s out of the way and herding isn’t exactly the most fun, I could make a living for us there.”

“Are you sure about this, Obi-Wan? Leaving with him? Will he even agree to it?”

Tahl asked. Obi-Wan laughed shortly. 

“No. Probably not without a fight. And it won’t be a fight that I intend to lose either.”

~*~*~*~*~

“Qui-Gon, we have three hours to catch the shuttle to Alderaan. So if you want to continue this argument there, and cause a scene, be my guest. But I won’t change my mind. I’m going with you and that’s final.”

Qui-Gon closed his eyes and his lips moved, making Obi-Wan wonder if he was trying to release his annoyance at his apprentice’s stubbornness into the Force. He stayed like that for a few minutes before he opened his eyes, ready to start the battle once more.

“Obi-Wan...As much as I appreciate you stepping up and taking responsibility when you don’t have to, I must insist. You’ve been nominated for your trials. I cannot, with all good conscience, let you walk away from all that you have worked for all your life.”

Obi-Wan crossed his arms and huffed.

“And what kind of a man would I be if I were to simply let the mother of my children walk away into the galaxy and not take responsibility for the lives I helped create and in your case, ruin?”

Qui-Gon flinched at that. 

“Obi-Wan, you didn’t ruin my life. Things just happened. We made our choices and now we have to live with the consequences. Now if you have learned anything from me, you surely must know that all of our choices have consequences.”

Obi-Wan laughed. A short, cynical laugh that made Qui-Gon wonder if it had been learned from  _ him. _

“I also learned that I must also take responsibility for the outcomes of my choices. I would be playing your teachings false if I ignored you and my children. No. You all are far more important than a knighthood. I’m going with you, and that’s final.”

Qui-Gon shook his head and trilled angrily.

“Obi-Wan! Listen to me! I already pulled you down with me. I nearly destroyed your chances at being a padawan and a knight. I can’t let you do this. I can’t let you cover for me again. I can’t.”

Obi-Wan stared at Qui-Gon in mute shock at this revelation. Surely Qui-Gon didn’t think that-

Before he could interject, Tahl and Adi Galla rushed towards them, leaving the conversation half-settled for the time being. 

“Adi? Tahl? What are you doing here?”

Qui-Gon asked, clearly shocked at their arrival, since he hadn’t expected anyone except Obi-Wan to see him off. 

“Trying to prevent your stubborn padawan from making a big mistake and securing you a future! Honestly, out of all the things that he had to inherit from you, the bantha-like stubbornness wasn’t what I had expected.”

Obi-Wan scowled while Qui-Gon pressed his lips tightly together in an effort to not smile. Despite it being a dig at him, he did have enough self-awareness to smile at the joke. Not to mention that he had been dealing with Obi-Wan’s own particular stubbornness already, so he couldn’t really deny that was the case right there.

“Right. Well, how will you do that? He’s determined to come with me to Alderaan.”

Qui-Gon pointed out calmly, making Obi-wan scowl.

“Obi-Wan, your main concern is taking care of Qui-Gon, correct?”

Tahl asked, making Obi-Wan nod suspiciously. 

“I have spoken to Queen Breha and Senator Organa and given them a basic outline of the situation. They agreed with practically everyone that it would a shame to lose such a promising knight as yourself and not to mention that they have an outstanding favour owed to Qui-Gon that they have been wanting to repay for a long time.”

Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan looked at each other in mute surprise before Qui-Gon interjected.

“Tahl...It wasn’t much. I was just doing my duty. Surely it doesn’t warrant a favour of this magnitude.”

Qui-Gon protested, but Tahl and Adi shook their heads. 

“Maybe it isn’t. Maybe it is. The point is though, you’d have a home and a steady income as an advisor during the time Obi-Wan finishes his training.”

Adi then turned to Obi-Wan, who was listening to this quietly, taking it all in and weighing the pros and cons of the situation. 

“You wouldn’t have to give up your dream and Qui-Gon and your children would be safe and taken care of. I know it isn’t ideal...But surely you could find it in yourself to think it over. Knighthood is all you’ve ever wanted. Why deny yourself the chance?”

She was right. Both of them were right. And despite his strict sense of duty to Qui-Gon and his future children, he had to swallow his pride and admit that it was the best choice for the situation that they were facing. 

He was getting the easiest out ever and he’d be a stubborn and blind bantha to not take it. 

He also had to admit that Qui-Gon had been strangely prescient in trying to leave their living quarters early in the morning and thus leaving the Council in the dark about Obi-Wan’s own plans if Masters Tahl and Adi Galla hadn’t arrived when they did. 

Something that he made a mental note to pursue after Qui-Gon had been settled. 

“As much as I want to just take Qui-Gon and run, even I can’t be blind to the solution that you have provided for us. I will stay and take my knighthood. And I will be there for when they are born. I won’t have you go through that alone.”

Qui-Gon’s shoulders loosened at that as he let out a sigh of relief.

He wasn’t sure how Tahl and Adi Galla had found out when he would be leaving since he had taken pains to be as quiet as possible with his departure. But he had to admit that he was glad that they had come. He doubted that he would have been successful in dissuading Obi-Wan from leaving with him.

Especially since he didn’t want to. Not really. 

As much as he was giving all the right reasons for it to not happen, he  _ wanted _ Obi-Wan to come with him. His mate, the sire of his children. He wanted. 

But he couldn’t do that to him. He’d already been selfish and cruel to him and he had become painfully aware of his failings towards Obi-Wan. He had punished him for Xanato’s failing and for the loss of Tahl in his life. He had forced Obi-Wan to carry his burden for him and he wasn’t going to do that again. 

It wasn’t fair, despite him being his apprentice. He wasn’t going to force him to shoulder this burden again. 

He didn’t let any of this bleed through their bond. He only smiled and embraced his mate, inhaling the scent of rain and grass that always clung to him, committing it to memory as he did.

“Be well, Obi-Wan.”

Obi-Wan clung tightly to him then, pulling back to look at him, his grey eyes studying him before he smiled that slow half-smile that made Qui-Gon’s heart hurt in a particular way before letting him go.

“You as well, Qui-Gon.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*

_ “Why did you do it?” _

_ Tahl asked Adi Galla as they sat in Tahl’s quarters, drinking tea after a lull in discussing what training Obi-Wan needed to focus on after the Council had approved of Tahl stepping in as his Master now that Qui-Gon was in Alderaan. _

_ “Do what?” _

_ Adi asked, pouring more tea into her cup and sipping the fragrant black brew slowly. _

_ “Vouched for Qui-Gon to Bail and Breha. You surely didn’t have to remind them of the succession crisis and the trials that preceded it. The unresolved issues that Qui-Gon somehow got sorted in the span of a month. So why?” _

_ Adi hummed in agreement as she took another sip of tea and sat back. _

_ “It was the least I could do for him, when my vote in the Senate wasn’t enough.” _

_ Tahl’s fingers went numb, making her slosh tea over her hand before she clumsily dropped the cup onto the table, miraculously not breaking it.  _

_ Adi Galla looked sideways at her, nodding to herself as she drank the rest of her tea. _

_ “I suggest you stop that line of inquiry and focus on getting Obi-Wan through the trials. You’ll only meet a brick wall there that will do nothing but discourage you and break your heart as well.” _

_ Adi cautioned her in a voice that was barely above a whisper, disappearing into the kitchen for more water and tea. _

_ And Tahl, despite the questions and recriminations, had done as requested. _

_ ~*~*~*~*~*~ _

Tahl smiled at the way that Obi-Wan shifted from foot to foot as he waited for the Queen of Alderaan and her advisors to appear. 

“Obi-Wan, it’s going to be fine. Don’t get so worked up.”

Tahl murmured to her mission partner, her tone soothing as she too fought the anxiety at seeing Qui-Gon again. 

“It has been two years, Tahl. I can’t help but to worry.”

Obi-Wan whispered back. 

Two years of dealing with troubling rumours of insurgents in the Mid and Outer rim. Two years of finding and fighting to keep Force gifted individuals from a shadow that Obi-Wan and Tahl couldn’t name, but felt all the same. 

There were holocalls. And letters on expensive flimsi. A bundle that had grown to be nearly a handspan thick by the time they touched back onto Coruscant and got sent off to Alderaan with only what felt like a moment’s respite from it all. 

A bundle that he had read and kept with him no matter where he went. Maybe it was sentimental. Or foolish, but he didn’t care. 

They made Qui-Gon and their children real. They made the future that he was planning tangible and possible, rather than just fancies scribbled on scraps of flimsi that he’d burn in his more rational moments. 

They were the lifelines that he relied on without being there, beside Qui-Gon and the children whose names he traced over and over again until the flimsi had worn thinner than Nabu silk. The names were almost unreadable, but he had memorised them. That was all that mattered.

He swallowed hard as he wondered what they were like now. Nearly a year old, give or take a few months. Did they look like him? Or Qui-Gon? Did they-

Tahl’s soft nudge pulled him away from his musings and his body going still.

Queen Breha had finally arrived. 

He and Tahl waited for the Queen to make her way to them and Obi-Wan tried to keep the composure that was threatening to break the moment that he saw that familiar tall figure in the back. 

“He’s here.”

Tahl nodded, neither of them moving until Queen Breha stopped. They bowed and the queen and her husband, Bail returned the greeting.

Obi-Wan could only just keep his mind on the pleasantries that lasted far too long for his taste, despite being brief for a court. He bowed and waited for a few minutes before he made his excuses to an amused Bail Organa and went to Qui-Gon. His Qui-Gon, who stood in the shadow of a pillar, his height still making him noticeable despite his hiding place and the others milling about.

He paused in front of Qui-Gon, both of them unsure of how to proceed after not having seen each other in two years.

The insecurity lasted for a moment before Qui-Gon wrapped him up in an embrace that had Obi-Wan fisting the fine plaid patterned cloak in order to convince himself that this right here, was real. That it was no longer idle fancies on flimsi, but that he was here, with Qui-Gon in his arms, his Sapir and bergamot scent clinging to him as they held each other.

“I missed you. I yearned for this. For two years, I worried I wouldn’t see you again. That you wouldn’t come back to me. To us.”

Qui-Gon whispered, pulling away enough to look at Obi-Wan and smile.

“I feared the same. That it was just fleeting fancies on flimsi, fragile and easily swept away. But I am here. With you.”

He paused, looking up at Qui-Gon, his heart beating faster than it had ever beat before.

“Will you let me stay this time?”

Qui-Gon’s eyes darted back and forth as he held onto Obi-Wan and buried his face into his neck. 

_ “Yes, a thousand, a million times yes. Please stay.” _

 


End file.
